I drew – out another annual goals for this year of 2019. Writing is easy but thinking and choosing the priorities are the hardest.

Through the years, I have learned that the bottle neck of all my dreams is not about other persons but me, myself and I.

An essential amount of maturity led met to realize that dreams and fulfillment are all about me, myself and I. The rest will be just secondary to the me, myself and I.

I have learned trough the years that I have to avoid the feeling of frustrations because the moment that feeling sets in, I loose hope to carry – on. I have learned that as a person I can bear sadness, loneliness and aloneness but the fire to continue to work on whatever kind of endeavor that I am acting on is put – off once the feeling of frustration knocks and stays.
With that knowledge in mind, I need to avoid the feeling of frustration.

Avoiding and Recovering from Feeling of Frustrations Led Me to Self-Awareness

As explored that discovery about myself, I was led to train myself to be aware of things that make me feel frustrated. I have two ways to win over the feeling frustration, first is to avoid (when the frustration is knocking) and second is to recover (kicking – out the feeling of frustration out of the system).

I am no great achiever, but I tried to execute these two ways through prayer time, my quiet

time with the Lord, every. single. day.
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Prayer Time Is Building Your Relationship With the Lord

When I joined Singles for Christ, a Catholic charismatic community, in 2001, I was thought to pray from the heart. In no time, I fell in love with the Lord. I started talking to Him quietly by spending few minutes every start of the day. I was told by my Catholic renewal leaders that prayer is a communication and is a dialogue. Since this is a dialogue, I should not be alone talking here. Otherwise, this will be called a monologue. This was where reading the daily gospel came to the picture.

That silent moment from the world but actively in tune with God is the avenue to express my being without limitations and hear His Word for me.

I can be me and He can be God. What was most beautiful is that even though I can be me truly me, He never has given me bad words about me, myself and I. Not even a single, short word.

I guess that’s the first thing that made me build and continue the silent time with God, He accepts me.

“I must be wonderful to be accepted by this God.”

Eighteen years after the day I fell in love with prayer time, I still get teary – eyed to believe and feel that, “I must be wonderful to be accepted by this God.”

Believing my own kind of wonder, I was led to discover about me, appreciate about me. This me I realized has weakness and strength and as years progress (Thank God), age comes to play with my beautiful complexities.

When in the first place I wanted only to build a relationship with Him, God introduced me to a person special to His eyes. He reveals to me that He got the thrill of His Lordship when His created this person – Me.

“God saw all that he had made, and it was very good. There was evening and there was morning: the sixth day.”
Genesis 1:31

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To be continued…. (Knowing Me Means Being Compassionate to Others)

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Thank you and God bless,

With Love and Beauty,

B

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Report says that only 2% of the entire population of the wholewide world has the chance to keep their childhood friends until they reach their death beds. I am one of that 2%. And that is one of my greatest blessings.

I lost Grace, my friend since the time I can not read nor write, last year after a 5-year battle with breast cancer. She was both a source of influence and surprises to me. She even in her last moments did not fail to surprise me. During the last night of the wake, I asked her brothers to take a nap while I volunteered to keep watch through out the early morning.

Before I continue my story, let me share a another story first.
In my seventeen years of membership of the charismatic community, my first ever ministry that I joined was to pray for the dead family members of fellow singles. So, almost every week during the first two years, I had free meals because of wake events where we prayed and sung “Till the end of my days..” One of my leaders even said that if ever we were paid, then, we could have earned at least our transport allowance for the whole month because our group was always called for that kind of event.

But, it was far more different and I must say, difficult for Grace’s time. When I was praying the Prayer for the Dead and singing “Till the end of my days, Oh Lord. I will bless Your name. Sing You praise. Give You thanks. All my days…” in a soft voice, I was wholeheartedly accepting the end of our friendship.
After praying, I placed my phone on a table to take a selfie and her coffin at the background. I set the timer to 5 seconds but before it reached 5, I thought I heard someone called “Benia”. There was no one else in the room and I know that was Grace sending her surprise, maybe her last surprise and accepting wholeheartedly the end of our friendship.

The last time that I visited her, she promised that we will meet outside and not anymore in her house. While her coffin was lowered to the ground, I realized that she kept her promise.

And life continues.

2019 Plans and A New Grace, A New Bestfriend

On my 2019 plans, I did not write down a dream that has been in my annual plans, first time for many years. This year, I did not write, “To be a Bride.” Instead, I wrote a new dream, a new prayer, “Be blessed with a new Grace, another best friend.”
I know that there would be no one like Grace. Her memories will always have a special spot in my heart. But, I also know that it’s never late to find and keep a new grace, a new best friend. A best friend who stays and decides to stay a friend despite all odds. A best friend who brings your soul closer to the Lord. A bestfriend who enriches your life and makes life easier and happier to live in. A best friend who is also a God’s gift.
So, this year I am not praying for a spouse for the first time in many years but I am praying for a new bestfriend.
Or, who knows the Lord will send me a bachelor version of Grace.
โค๏ธ

Dear Lord, thank You for your endless grace. I received one through Grace. Please hug Grace today for me. I know if she was to tell me a new dream, she would tell me this again, “Benia, find a new bestfriend, someone like me but unlike me in many ways. Someone, maybe who can also be your spouse.”

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Praying for another best friend this year?

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God invited time.โŒš

In all our prayers, He does so.

So, trust His planning and wait patiently. Because time is invited.

And it shows up to all of His invitations.

You Will Be Chosen (Learning to Clap For the Winner During Times of Rejection)

In my lifetime, I have lost count of the number of times that I was not chosen for areas that I have expressed my desire and displayed my efforts to be chosen. This had happened in the areas of my career, personal life, dating and even in friendship, in small and big decisions of others that resulted to a feeling of rejection.

While the world claps for the one that was chosen, there is always someone else from the opposite side of the coin, the one that was not chosen.

While, this happens, there is a big temptation to ask “Why not me?”

Just like any chemical compound where each has it’s own identity, no one is an exact replica of one person.

Each one of us is uniquely different from another person and if a person was chosen for a role and there is no other person like that person, the question “Why not me?” is actually invalid.

But if this temptation to ask “Why not me?” occurs, why not change that question with “Why not now?”

Because the question “Why not now?” is more of an active question than a paralysing question.

As I grow to be more “adultly” each year, I have realized that time is an ingredient of success that is learned by natural process. By considering time in the process of selection and success, preparation becomes crucial. I have read the book “How Luck Happens” and my main take away point in that is Luck happens to the the prepared and focused and preparation and focus is equivalent to time.

“Why not now?” means you need to know a lot more. “Why not now?” means you have to practise more. “Why not now?” means you have to know more of yourself. “Why not now?” means you have to know more about you dreams or skills… Or whatever it takes.

For where I am now in my life and what I have seen and transpired to people around me, success, fulfillment of dreams happens not based on the question “Why not me?” but “Why not now?”

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The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in Him, and He helps me.

Psalm 28:7

Keep on rowing, knowing that it is a privilege to work with God – and a blessing to be helped by Him – Darlene Sala.

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Finding hope and encouragement in this post?Please send me a like and share. It will truly be appreciated.

Thank you, profoundly.

Love and Beauty,

B

(First of Two Parts)
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When God said “Fear not for I am with you, Do not be dismayed for I am Your God, I am holding You with my victorious right hand” He is referring for us to be courageous, to be strong. Because there will be difficulties, we are living in a fallen world. However, we have a Helper and in that strength, we will find joy!

Our hurts, rejections and failures will only make sense if we learn from them.

The mercy of God will come through lessons, too. He counsels us with His gentle staff.

Otherwise, these will not serve us good and we will miss living life to the fullest if we don’t risk with possibilities of pain, rejections and failures. Generally, I call them heartbreak.

Today, I want to recall and identify lessons I gained from ex – managers, ex-group leaders, ex – household members, ex – interviewers, ex – parish priests and ex – strangers and maybe, ex – crushes, ex – service partners and ex – boyfriend (Yes, he is only one).

10. ๐Ÿ’– It was my last round of interview and I can feel so closed to signing the job offer. Then, my current boss called me and spent time at the phone. In the end, I came late. I did not get the job offer.

Lesson, learn to say “no” right away if the number one priority is compromised.

9. ๐Ÿ’– Set a daily priority. Huge priorities in life can be overwhelming so, set daily priorities.

8. ๐Ÿ’– Stick to your defined priorities. At all cost.

7. ๐Ÿ’– I have been hearing, “He is paasa. ” (He makes girls build false – hopes around him.)

Lesson: Don’t ignore. There is, somehow, a truth in it.

6. ๐Ÿ’– Sisters have in their DNA to be pursued. They have an innate craving for it. A lady might say, I’m from the newest generation where men and women can do the same thing. Sister, that’s not true. You might do the pursuing now, but sooner or later, doubt will be knocking at the door. You will DEMAND, for an affirmation.

Lesson: Sister, allow your DNA to speak, be pursued. Be someone worth the pursuit.

5. ๐Ÿ’– Cheaters have signs. Do not ignore the first time the sign appears.

4. ๐Ÿ’– It takes character to say “I am sorry.” to someone who says to you “I got hurt by your words.” For instances like these, no explanation is needed why the other person got hurt. The truth that the other person got hurt then, “sorry” is much needed from the offender.

3. ๐Ÿ’– If cheaters have signs all the more the MAN who is worthy of your time, your attention, your care, your love and your trust. The signs will be set by your mind with your heart.

2. ๐Ÿ’– The one who wins never quits. The one who quits never win. It will only take time and your being to reach your dream.
Always remember that even God did not quit when Adam, His first man fell into disobedience in the Garden of Eve. He has to plan and thereby, incorporating “TIME” to fulfill it.

1. ๐Ÿ’– If you see him/her with someone new, if the unexpected sighting hurts, in spirit and in truth, then, comfort your heart. Avoid them. Pray for them.

It is my hope and in my prayers that you find lessons from your ex-periences today.

I will leave a song for you today.

๐ŸŽถThe steadfast love of the Lord never ceases. His mercy has never come to an end. They are new every morning. New every morning. Great is Thy faithfulness. ๐ŸŽถ

For all of these O Lord, I praise You and I thank You. Let me find wisdom in my experiences. Amen.

Finding hope in this post? Please send a like and share.

Thank you for sharing your time. It is truly appreciated.

While I wait for my rescheduled flight (I’m so used to these kind of changes every Christmas flight that I forgot how to complain and just now, I smiled and teasingly told the neatly hair-tied airline staff, “Don’t I get to have at least a free burger for this?”) I remembered one new year’s eve, a neighbor who was a palm reading enthusiast told me her prediction. I was a little girl then and not in school that I don’t know how to write even my own name yet. She was so amazed, I guess, that after she got my palm, she called my Mama. “Mrs Linda, something is with your child.” Before Mama arrived, our neighbor told me a revelation and those words were placed in my young mind and spoken straight to my believing heart, “Nene, great things are found in your palm. You will constantly fly and you will be victorious! Big stars and great – sized airplanes are written in your palms. ”
I hardly remember our neighbor’s name but those big words were spoken straight to my young believing heart from that time until now. “Great things are found in your palms.”
I don’t believe in palm reading but I believe that there is a great future for each one of us, that big stars are written in our names and humongous airplanes are drawn in our palm because we can soar high. We are able. We are free. Because, the great future ahead of us was planned right even before we existed, as a privilege.

As 2018 bids farewell, may we remember every person whether stranger, family, friend, colleague, leader or any human being who believes in our capacity to fulfill our dreams, to achieve and to soar.

As 2018 comes to a close, I thank the Lord for the gift of the combination of my passport and SG residency, the gift of courage for all my past hurdles in school, my guiding parents and all teachers who all believed, maybe, not even in my talents but only because the lines my palm tell them to believe in me.

Dear Lord, we claim today Your big and great plans for us from Your Mighty Big hands. Please help us fulfill those. Amen.

#GodhasbeengoodToMe
#tearyeyed
#thankyoufamily